THE DREADFUL DRAMATIC DIALOGUE AND ACTION DELETED FROM “A HARD DAY’S NIGHT,” which ended up on the cutting room floor.

Today brings part 2, featuring more deleted but curious scenes removed from the motion picture, “A Hard Day’s Night” as we continue this fun journey to acquire some further bits and pieces how the film originally proposed its running cameras to showcase the screenplay. Remember, all rejected portions show in [Bold Font.]  Let's continue. . .

Seated in the train compartment, after the Boys understand the little old man is Paul’s other grandfather, John asks, “What’s he doing here?”

Paul: “Well, me mother thought the trip would do him good.”

Ringo: “How’s that?”

Paul: He’s nursing a broken heart.”

John: Aah, poor old thing.” (John leans across to Grandfather and says) “Hey Mister, are you nursing a broken heart?” (The Grandfather glares at him in a way that indicates yes.)

John: “He’s a nice old man, isn’t he?”

Paul: “He’s very––clean.” (The bandmates agree.)

[Paul: (whispering) “You see, he was going to get married, but she threw him over for a butcher.”

George: “A butcher?”

Paul: “Yeah, she was fickle.”

John: “Aye, and fond of fresh meat and all.”

Paul: (Seriously) “No. . . It was his sweetbreads. She was dead kinky for his sweetbreads. Anyroad, me mother thought it would give him a change of scenery, like.”

John: Oh, I see.”]

John: (In an over-friendly voice) “Hello, Grandfather.”

Grandfather: “Hello.”

John: (Delighted) “He can talk, then?”

Paul: (Indignantly) “Course he can talk. He’s a human being, isn’t he?”

Ringo: (Grinning) “Well if he’s your grandfather, who knows?”

John: “And we’re looking after him, are we?”

Grandfather: “I’ll look after meself.”

Paul (Standing) “Aye, that’s what I’m afraid of.”

John: “Has he got you worried?”

Paul: (Combing hair) “He’s a villain and a real mixer, and he costs you a fortune in breach of promise cases.”

George: (Disbelieving) “Go on.”

Paul: “No, straight up.”

[Grandfather: “The lad’s given you the simple truth. I’m cursed with irresistible charm; I’m too attractive to be let loose.”] (At this moment, Shake, a tall man who works for the Boys pulls open the door of the compartment.)

Boys: “Hi, Shake.”

Shake: You got on alright, then?”

John: “No.”

Shake: Oh, well, we’re here. Norm will be along with the tickets.”

Next: Enters the older objector train traveler given the name, Johnson in the script. . . (Skip to Lennon’s line)

.John: “Yeah, but there are four of us, and we’d like it open, if it’s all the same to you, that is.”

Johnson: (Rudely) “Well, it isn’t. I travel on this train regularly, twice a week, so I suppose I have some rights.”

Ringo: “So have we.” (Johnson covers his face behind the newspaper – Ringo frowns then turns on the portable radio, and rock music spills out.)

Johnson: “And we’ll have that thing off as well, thank you.” (Johnson leans over and switches off the radio.)

Ringo: “But,”

Johnson: “An elementary knowledge of the Railway Acts would tell you I’m perfectly within my rights.”

Paul: “Yeah, but we want to hear it, and there is more of us than you. We’re a community, like a majority vote. Up with the workers and all that stuff.”

Johnson: “Then I suggest you take that damned thing into the corridor or some other part of the train where you obviously belong.”

John: (Leaning forward toward Johnson) “Give us a kiss.”

Paul: “Look, Mister, we paid for our seats too, you know.”

Johnson: “I travel on this train regularly, twice a week.”

John: “Knock it off Paul, you can’t win with his sort, after all, it’s his train, isn’t it, Mister?”

Johnson: “And don’t you take that tone with me, young man.”

[George: “But.”]

Johnson: “I fought the war for your sort.”

Ringo: “Bet you’re sorry you won.”

Johnson: “I shall call the guard.”

Paul: “Aye, but what? They don’t take kindly to insults. Come on, lads, let’s get a cup of coffee and leave the kennel to Lassie.” (The Boys exit but soon a tap at the window gets Johnson’s attention, and we see pressed against the glass four hideous Beatle faces.) Paul: “Hey, Mister. Can we have our ball back?”  [(The man jumps to his feet.)] (This time the Boys bang against the outside window) “Hey Mister, can we have our ball back?” [(From the P.O.V. of the door leading to the restaurant car, the Boys come down the corridor in full flight, laughing away like happy idiots. George and Paul pull open the sliding doors and all four look inside.)]

Norm: “Yeah, you want to watch it.”

Shake: Unhappily) “It’s not my fault.”

Norm: “Well, you stick to that story, son.”

Shake: “I can’t help it. I’m just taller than you.”

Grandfather: (To norm, slyly) “They always say that.”

Next, Norm: “Your grandfather pointed out Shake was always being taller than me just to spite me.”

Paul: “I knew it –– he started it. I should have known.”

Norm: “Ya-What?”

Paul: “You two have never had a quarrel in your life, and in two minutes flat he’s got you at it. He’s a king mixer. [Adam and Eve, meet the serpent. Anthony and Cleopatra, there’s your asp. David and Conquer, that’s this one’s motto.] He hates group unity, so he gets everyone at it. [Aye, and we’ll have to watch it and all.”]

George: “Well, I suggest you give him the photos and have done with it.”

Norm: “You’re right, here you are old granddad.”

Grandfather: “Would you ever sign this one for us, Pauly?”

(Paul does so but gets suspicious. Grandfather smiles at him charmingly, so Paul finishes signing.)

[John: “Come on, let’s get this coffee.”]

[Grandfather: “Before you go, I think it’s only fair to warn you about me grandson. Don’t let our Paul have his own way all the time, cause if you do he won’t respect you.” (John, Ringo, and George take this up straight away .and pretend to be girls. Ringo jumps into Paul’s arms.)]

[George: (Coyly) “Oh, Paul, you can’t have your own way.”]

[John: (Invitingly, in a Marlene Dietrich voice) “If I let you have your own way, you little rascal, will you respect me?”]

[Paul: (Upset) “I’ll murder you, Grandfather.” (John waltzes Paul down to an empty table, and all the lads take a seat.]

George: “Hey, look at the talent.” (We see two very attractive young girls having coffee.)

John: “Give em a pull.”

Paul: “Shall I?”

George: “Aye, but don’t rush. None of your five-bar gate jumps and over sort of stuff.”

Paul: “What’s that supposed to mean?”

George: (Grinning) “I don’t know, I just thought it sounded distinguished like.”

John: “George Harrison, The Scouse of Distinction.”

Paul: (Approaches the girl's table) “Excuse me, Madame. Excuse me, but these young men I’m sitting with wondered if two of us could join you; I’d ask you meself only I’m shy.”

Grandfather: (Sternly) “I’m sorry Miss, but you mustn’t fraternize with me prisoners.”

Jean: “Prisoners?”

Grandfather: “Convicts in transit to Wormwood Scrubs. Typical old lags, the lot of them.”

The Boys: “Ya-What?”

[Grandfather: “Quiet, you lot, or I’ll give you a touch of me truncheon.” (He points at Ringo.) “That little one’s the worst. If we don’t keep him on tablets, he has fits.”]

[Ringo: (Protesting) “Now look here!” (Grandfather grabs two lumps of sugar from the table and forces them into Ringo’s mouth.)]

Grandfather: “Get out while you can, ladies. [his time’s coming round for one of his turns.”]

(The girls scurry out of the restaurant car as the Boys look at Grandfather in horror. [Grandfather smiles at the lads benignly.]

Next week we shall dive into the scene that has Norm puzzled why grandfather hasn’t returned from down the ahh, and Shake shrugs it off believing the old fellow needs a couple more minutes. But, it isn’t the call of nature that has delayed Senior McCartney, it’s something much more as you will soon discover.

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